### Can social media actually help me achieve mental stillness?

From my perspective, social media is more likely to create Vritti, or fluctuations in the mind, rather than Citta Vritti Nirodah, the cessation of those fluctuations. When you scroll, your mind is constantly jumping from one external object to another, fueled by Raga, which is attachment to pleasure, and Dvesha, which is aversion to what we dislike. This constant stimulation keeps the mind in a state of Rajas, or restless activity. To achieve true stillness, one must practice Pratyahara, the withdrawal of the senses from these external digital projections, focusing instead on the unchanging light within.

How do I deal with the FOMO I feel when I see others online?

What you call FOMO is a manifestation of the Kleshas, specifically attachment and egoism. You are comparing your internal state to the curated external projections of others, which is a form of false perception. This comparison breeds Dukkha, or suffering. I suggest practicing Santosha, which is contentment. By turning your gaze inward through meditation, you realize that everything you seek is already present within your own consciousness. When you are content with the Self, the need to compare your life to the digital shadows of others naturally fades away.

Why do I feel more tired after spending time talking to people online?

Interaction through a screen often lacks the Prana, or life force, found in direct presence, and it demands a high level of mental fragmentation. You are dispersing your energy through the eyes and the intellect without the grounding influence of the breath or physical stillness. In my teachings, energy is preserved through Dharana, or concentration. When your attention is split between multiple tabs and notifications, your vital energy leaks out, leaving the mind fatigued and the spirit feeling depleted. True rest comes from Ekagrata, the one-pointedness of mind that digital environments actively work against.

Is it possible to find real friendship in a digital world according to Yoga?

Real friendship flourishes when we practice Maitri, or loving-kindness, toward those who are happy. Yoga teaches that our relationships should be a means to refine the mind. Digital spaces often encourage performative behavior rather than the authentic sharing of one's path. If your online interactions are based on shared virtues and help lead each other toward clarity and non-attachment, they have value. However, if they are merely tools for the ego to seek validation, they will always leave you feeling empty. True union is found when we see the same universal consciousness in another, regardless of the medium.

What is a simple yogic practice to stop feeling lonely right now?

I recommend the practice of Kriya Yoga: discipline, self-study, and surrender. Start with Pranayama—simple breath control—to anchor your awareness in the present moment. Observe the loneliness without judgment, recognizing it as a passing wave in the mind. By practicing Svadhyaya, or self-study, you can ask yourself where this loneliness resides in the body. As you deepen your concentration, you will find a place of inner solitude that is not lonely, but full. This is the transition from the Prakriti of external distraction to the Purusha of your eternal, silent witness.

Why do I feel so lonely even though I'm always connected online? — Patanjali's answer

Patanjali

~2nd century BC–4th century AD · India

You feel lonely because you are confusing the screen with the soul. You are looking at the seen and calling it the seer. When you go online, you are engaging with images and echoes, not with the source of life within yourself or another. This digital connection is a movement of the mind, a restless ripple on the surface of a lake. It provides a momentary distraction, but it does not touch the stillness where true belonging lives. Understand that your mind is like a clear diamond. When you place it next to a blue cloth, the diamond looks blue. When you place it next to a glowing screen, the diamond takes on the frantic, hungry quality of the feed. You feel empty because you have let the mind identify entirely with these external reflections. You have forgotten that the one who observes the screen is not the screen itself. To find peace, you must use the two wings. First, practice. Set aside time each day to sit in the quiet. Do not look for anything; simply observe the breath and the way thoughts bubble up and dissolve. This is how you return home to yourself. Second, cultivate non-attachment. This does not mean you must throw your phone away. It means you stop expecting a glass of salt water to quench your thirst. You use the tool, but you do not let it define your worth or your presence. Connectivity is a transaction, but connection is an orientation of the heart. True connection requires you to be fully present in the here and now, without the filter of an interface. When you stop looking outward for validation, the inward void begins to fill with its own light. You are never actually alone, for the witness within you is the same witness within everyone else. You are simply distracted. Quiet the ripples, let the mind settle, and you will see that you have always been whole. Ground yourself in the unchanging, and the loneliness will lose its grip.

From the council, together

## Why does digital connection fail to ease the deep ache of personal loneliness? In our modern landscape, we are surrounded by a constant stream of information and virtual interactions, yet many find themselves suffering from a profound sense of isolation. From the perspective of classical Yoga as outlined in my Yoga Sutras, this discomfort arises because these digital connections primarily engage the Chitta, or the mind-stuff, in a way that fuels distraction rather than discernment. You feel lonely because your energy is scattered across outward fluctuations, or Vritti, rather than being anchored in the stable core of your true Self, the Purusha. Technology often acts as a mirror for the ego, reflecting back our desires and anxieties, which only deepens the illusion of separation from others and from our own inner stillness. This digital connectivity is frequently a form of Avidya, or ignorance, where we mistake the superficial reflection of a relationship for the actual union of consciousness. When you are always online, your mind is perpetually pulled toward external objects, preventing the internal quietude necessary to feel truly whole. The ache you feel is not a lack of data or social metrics; it is the soul’s exhaustion from being tethered to a fragmented reality. By understanding that peace comes through the cessation of these mental turnings, we begin to see that true connection is an internal state of being that no screen can provide, leading us back toward the realization of our inherent oneness. You feel lonely because you are confusing the screen with the soul. You are looking at the seen and calling it the seer. When you go online, you are engaging with images and echoes, not with the source of life within yourself or another. This digital connection is a movement of the mind, a restless ripple on the surface of a lake. It provides a momentary distraction, but it does not touch the stillness where true belonging lives. Understand that your mind is like a clear diamond. When you place it next to a blue cloth, the diamond looks blue. When you place it next to a glowing screen, the diamond takes on the frantic, hungry quality of the feed. You feel empty because you have let the mind identify entirely with these external reflections. You have forgotten that the one who observes the screen is not the screen itself. To find peace, you must use the two wings. First, practice. Set aside time each day to sit in the quiet. Do not look for anything; simply observe the breath and the way thoughts bubble up and dissolve. This is how you return home to yourself. Second, cultivate non-attachment. This does not mean you must throw your phone away. It means you stop expecting a glass of salt water to quench your thirst. You use the tool, but you do not let it define your worth or your presence. Connectivity is a transaction, but connection is an orientation of the heart. True connection requires you to be fully present in the here and now, without the filter of an interface. When you stop looking outward for validation, the inward void begins to fill with its own light. You are never actually alone, for the witness within you is the same witness within everyone else. You are simply distracted. Quiet the ripples, let the mind settle, and you will see that you have always been whole. Ground yourself in the unchanging, and the loneliness will lose its grip.

Common questions

### Can social media actually help me achieve mental stillness?: From my perspective, social media is more likely to create Vritti, or fluctuations in the mind, rather than Citta Vritti Nirodah, the cessation of those fluctuations. When you scroll, your mind is constantly jumping from one external object to another, fueled by Raga, which is attachment to pleasure, and Dvesha, which is aversion to what we dislike. This constant stimulation keeps the mind in a state of Rajas, or restless activity. To achieve true stillness, one must practice Pratyahara, the withdrawal of the senses from these external digital projections, focusing instead on the unchanging light within.
How do I deal with the FOMO I feel when I see others online?: What you call FOMO is a manifestation of the Kleshas, specifically attachment and egoism. You are comparing your internal state to the curated external projections of others, which is a form of false perception. This comparison breeds Dukkha, or suffering. I suggest practicing Santosha, which is contentment. By turning your gaze inward through meditation, you realize that everything you seek is already present within your own consciousness. When you are content with the Self, the need to compare your life to the digital shadows of others naturally fades away.
Why do I feel more tired after spending time talking to people online?: Interaction through a screen often lacks the Prana, or life force, found in direct presence, and it demands a high level of mental fragmentation. You are dispersing your energy through the eyes and the intellect without the grounding influence of the breath or physical stillness. In my teachings, energy is preserved through Dharana, or concentration. When your attention is split between multiple tabs and notifications, your vital energy leaks out, leaving the mind fatigued and the spirit feeling depleted. True rest comes from Ekagrata, the one-pointedness of mind that digital environments actively work against.
Is it possible to find real friendship in a digital world according to Yoga?: Real friendship flourishes when we practice Maitri, or loving-kindness, toward those who are happy. Yoga teaches that our relationships should be a means to refine the mind. Digital spaces often encourage performative behavior rather than the authentic sharing of one's path. If your online interactions are based on shared virtues and help lead each other toward clarity and non-attachment, they have value. However, if they are merely tools for the ego to seek validation, they will always leave you feeling empty. True union is found when we see the same universal consciousness in another, regardless of the medium.
What is a simple yogic practice to stop feeling lonely right now?: I recommend the practice of Kriya Yoga: discipline, self-study, and surrender. Start with Pranayama—simple breath control—to anchor your awareness in the present moment. Observe the loneliness without judgment, recognizing it as a passing wave in the mind. By practicing Svadhyaya, or self-study, you can ask yourself where this loneliness resides in the body. As you deepen your concentration, you will find a place of inner solitude that is not lonely, but full. This is the transition from the Prakriti of external distraction to the Purusha of your eternal, silent witness.