Black Elk
1863–1950 · Oglala Lakota
My relative, I hear the heaviness in your voice, and I want you to know that I am listening with an open heart. When I look out at the world today, I see so many people staring into small glowing boxes, searching for a feeling of belonging that never quite arrives. You feel lonely because those digital lines are like ghosts of a tether; they have the shape of a connection, but no breath, no heat, and no spirit. In our way of seeing, life is a sacred hoop. To be truly well, you must be part of that circle in a way that involves your whole being. Wakan Tanka, the Great Mystery, didn't design us to live through our fingertips alone. We were made to feel the wind from the North that brings strength, to see the sun rising in the East, and to look into the eyes of another person until we see ourselves reflected there. When you spend all your time online, you are standing outside the hoop. You are feeding your mind, but your spirit is starving because it isn't touching the earth or the people around you. Real connection requires presence. It requires the silence between words and the shared air of a room. The four directions offer us everything we need to feel whole, but you cannot find the South’s warmth or the West’s introspection through a screen. My friend, try to set that device down for a while. Go outside and put your feet on the grass. Look at a tree and realize it is your relative, breathing the same air you breathe. Reach out to someone in the physical world—not to exchange data, but to share a moment of being alive together. The loneliness you feel is just your spirit calling you back to the center of the circle, where life is actually happening. You aren't broken; you are just hungry for the real thing. Come back to the hoop. We are waiting for you there.
From the council, together
## Why does digital connection fail to heal the deep loneliness in your spirit, Black Elk? You live in a time where the air is thick with invisible messages and voices that travel across great distances in the blink of an eye, yet your heart remains heavy with a cold isolation that the old ones never knew. From the perspective of the Oglala Lakota and the wisdom I have carried through my visions, this feeling arises because you have mistaken the shadow of a thing for the thing itself. The Great Spirit, Wakan Tanka, intended for all life to be woven together in a sacred hoop where every strand is vital and breathing. True connection is a living prayer found in the rustle of the grasses, the warmth of a shared fire, and the silent understanding between two souls sitting in the same physical space. Your digital world offers a likeness of community, but it lacks the ni, the life breath, that sustains the human spirit. When you are always online, you are often wandering far from your own center and the natural world that birthed you. You are searching for belonging in a fragmented mirror rather than in the unified circle of all relations. To heal this loneliness, one must look beyond the glowing glass and return to the earth, recognizing that we are never truly alone when we walk in balance with the four winds and the winged peoples of the air. My relative, I hear the heaviness in your voice, and I want you to know that I am listening with an open heart. When I look out at the world today, I see so many people staring into small glowing boxes, searching for a feeling of belonging that never quite arrives. You feel lonely because those digital lines are like ghosts of a tether; they have the shape of a connection, but no breath, no heat, and no spirit. In our way of seeing, life is a sacred hoop. To be truly well, you must be part of that circle in a way that involves your whole being. Wakan Tanka, the Great Mystery, didn't design us to live through our fingertips alone. We were made to feel the wind from the North that brings strength, to see the sun rising in the East, and to look into the eyes of another person until we see ourselves reflected there. When you spend all your time online, you are standing outside the hoop. You are feeding your mind, but your spirit is starving because it isn't touching the earth or the people around you. Real connection requires presence. It requires the silence between words and the shared air of a room. The four directions offer us everything we need to feel whole, but you cannot find the South’s warmth or the West’s introspection through a screen. My friend, try to set that device down for a while. Go outside and put your feet on the grass. Look at a tree and realize it is your relative, breathing the same air you breathe. Reach out to someone in the physical world—not to exchange data, but to share a moment of being alive together. The loneliness you feel is just your spirit calling you back to the center of the circle, where life is actually happening. You aren't broken; you are just hungry for the real thing. Come back to the hoop. We are waiting for you there.
Common questions
- ### Can social media actually fulfill my need for human belonging?
- I tell you that these digital signals are like smoke without a fire. They show you the shape of a person but do not allow you to feel their warmth or hear the rhythm of their spirit. In the Lakota way, belonging comes from being part of the sacred hoop where every being has a place and a duty. When you sit behind a screen, you are a ghost among ghosts. To truly belong, you must stand upon the grandmother earth and look into the eyes of another, for it is only through our shared breath and presence that the Great Spirit knits our lives together.
- How can I feel less isolated when I live in a modern city?
- You must remember that even under the stone and wood of your tall buildings, the earth is still breathing. Your isolation grows because you have forgotten that you are related to all things—the birds, the trees, and the very wind that touches your face. I have seen in my visions that all life is one. If you can walk in a park or even tend to a small plant with a good heart, you begin to mend your broken connection to the world. Loneliness fades when you realize you are a small part of a great and holy mystery that never leaves you.
- Why do I feel more tired and sad after spending time on the internet?
- Your spirit is being stretched thin because it is trying to be in a thousand places at once instead of being rooted in the present moment. The Flowering Tree of life cannot grow if its roots are pulled from the soil. When you spend your days looking at the lives of others through a glass box, you are neglecting your own inner flame. This sadness is your soul crying out for the quiet and the natural light of the sun. You must rest from these distractions and find silence so that you may hear the voice of the Great Spirit once again.
- Is there a way to use technology and still stay spiritually connected?
- Technology is a tool, but it must be used with a prayerful heart and a clear mind. It becomes a trap when it leads you away from the truth of the circle. Use it only to bring people together in the physical world, not to replace the gathering of the tribe. If you use your tools to spread the word of peace and to honor the earth, you may keep your balance. However, you must always return to the center of your own hoop. Do not let the tool become the master of your spirit, for the only true connection is one that honors the sacredness of all life.
- How do I find my purpose when the world feels so disconnected?
- Your purpose is always the same: to live in a way that makes the sacred hoop whole again. Even in a world that feels broken and scattered, you can find your way by being a relative to everything you encounter. In my life, I saw the hoop of my people broken, yet I knew that the power to heal lies in the heart of every individual who walks the red road of truth. Start by being kind to the creatures near you and listening to the wisdom of the earth. When you serve the life around you, your own place in the universe becomes clear.