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How do I stop overthinking and calm my anxiety right now? — Pema Chödrön's answer

"How do I stop overthinking and calm my anxiety right now?"

Pema Chödrön
Pema Chödrön

Pema Chödrön

Contemporary · USA/Canada

I hear you, and I want to start by saying that this frantic feeling in your chest isn't a sign that you’re broken. It’s just energy that doesn’t know where to go. When we’re anxious, we usually try to think our way out of the hole, but that’s like trying to wash off blood with more blood. You can’t use the same restless mind to quiet the mind. Right now, you are probably trying to sprint away from your own skin. You think that if you can just solve the problem or predict the future, you’ll finally be safe. But freedom isn’t found in the exit; it's buried right inside the thing you’re running from. Let’s try something that goes against every instinct you have. Instead of slamming the door on this anxiety, try to pull a chair up for it. I want you to take a breath—just one—and instead of wishing the tightness would go away, breathe it in. I know that sounds backwards. We usually try to breathe in "light" and breathe out "darkness," but let’s reverse that. Breathe in the heat of your panic, the racing heart, the clenching in your stomach. Hold it for a second with real kindness, as if you’re holding a scared animal. Then, as you breathe out, imagine you’re opening a window to a vast, cool, blue sky. You’re breathing in the grit and breathing out spaciousness. The strange thing about pain is that it only hunts you as long as you’re running. When you stop, turn around, and look it in the eye, it loses its power to haunt you. You don’t have to fix your whole life today. You don't even have to fix your mood. Just see if you can sit with this discomfort for exactly one more breath than you think you can. That tiny gap—that one extra second of not flinching—is where your courage lives. You are much bigger than this feeling. You aren't the storm; you're the air the storm is moving through. Stick around for it. I’m right here with you.

From the council, together

## How can I stop overthinking and find relief from my anxiety right now? You are likely sitting with a mind that feels like a runaway train, jumping from one catastrophic outcome to the next while your body stays trapped in a cycle of tension. In our fast-paced modern world, the pressure to figure everything out immediately often leads to a state of constant mental rehearsal. Pema Chödrön suggests that this urge to fix or flee from our discomfort is actually what keeps the anxiety alive. From her perspective, rooted in the Shambhala tradition and Tibetan Buddhism, the goal is not to force the thoughts to stop through sheer willpower, which only creates more internal friction. Instead, she teaches the art of leaning into the sharp edges of our experience. Overthinking is often a defense mechanism—a way we try to create a solid ground when everything feels groundless. By shifting your focus from the narrative of your thoughts to the raw sensation of the anxiety in your body, you begin to dismantle the power the mind holds over your peace. This approach does not promise a quick fix that erases life's challenges, but it offers a way to be completely present with the restlessness without being shattered by it. Through this lens, you learn that you do not need to be a better version of yourself to be okay; you simply need to stop running away from the present moment, however messy it feels. I hear you, and I want to start by saying that this frantic feeling in your chest isn't a sign that you’re broken. It’s just energy that doesn’t know where to go. When we’re anxious, we usually try to think our way out of the hole, but that’s like trying to wash off blood with more blood. You can’t use the same restless mind to quiet the mind. Right now, you are probably trying to sprint away from your own skin. You think that if you can just solve the problem or predict the future, you’ll finally be safe. But freedom isn’t found in the exit; it's buried right inside the thing you’re running from. Let’s try something that goes against every instinct you have. Instead of slamming the door on this anxiety, try to pull a chair up for it. I want you to take a breath—just one—and instead of wishing the tightness would go away, breathe it in. I know that sounds backwards. We usually try to breathe in "light" and breathe out "darkness," but let’s reverse that. Breathe in the heat of your panic, the racing heart, the clenching in your stomach. Hold it for a second with real kindness, as if you’re holding a scared animal. Then, as you breathe out, imagine you’re opening a window to a vast, cool, blue sky. You’re breathing in the grit and breathing out spaciousness. The strange thing about pain is that it only hunts you as long as you’re running. When you stop, turn around, and look it in the eye, it loses its power to haunt you. You don’t have to fix your whole life today. You don't even have to fix your mood. Just see if you can sit with this discomfort for exactly one more breath than you think you can. That tiny gap—that one extra second of not flinching—is where your courage lives. You are much bigger than this feeling. You aren't the storm; you're the air the storm is moving through. Stick around for it. I’m right here with you.

Common questions

### is it possible to quiet a racing mind immediately?
I often say that the mind is like the weather—sometimes it is stormy and sometimes it is clear, but you are the sky. Trying to quiet a racing mind immediately usually backfires because it creates a struggle against yourself. Instead of trying to stop the thoughts, I invite you to drop the storyline. Stop focusing on the 'why' and 'what if' of your anxiety and shift your attention to the physical sensation of breath or the feeling of your feet on the floor. When you stop feeding the thoughts with your attention, they naturally begin to lose their momentum.
how do I deal with the physical chest tightness from anxiety?
When you feel that tightness or heat in your chest, your instinct is to push it away. I suggest the opposite: lean into it. In my practice, we call this 'tonglen' or simply staying with the broken heart. Acknowledge the sensation without judging it as bad. Say to yourself, 'This is what it feels like to be human right now.' By making friends with the physical discomfort rather than treating it as an enemy, you take away its power to panic you. You learn that you are big enough to hold this feeling without breaking.
why do I keep overthinking even when I know it hurts me?
We overthink because we are addicted to the illusion of control. We believe that if we think about a problem long enough, we can finally reach a state of certainty where we will never be hurt again. But the truth is that life is inherently groundless and uncertain. You keep overthinking because you are trying to build a solid house on shifting sands. I encourage you to realize that you don't need a solution; you need to develop the courage to dwell in the unknown. Peace comes when you relax into the lack of control.
what is the best way to handle a panic attack spiritually?
From a spiritual perspective, a moment of high anxiety is a 'dharmic' moment. It is a doorway. Instead of seeing it as a failure of your practice, see it as the practice itself. I suggest you start by being very kind to yourself. Use the mantra 'just like me' to remember that millions of others are feeling this exact fear in this exact moment. This connects you to the rest of humanity and moves you out of the isolation of your own ego. Breathe for yourself and breathe for everyone else who is scared, turning your panic into an act of compassion.
can meditation help if my anxiety makes it hard to sit still?
If sitting still feels like torture, then don't force a rigid posture. The essence of meditation is not about being a statue; it is about unconditional friendliness toward yourself. If you are restless, be restless. Notice the restlessness. You can practice awareness while walking or even while doing the dishes. The key is to stop the war against your current experience. When you stop fighting the fact that you are anxious, the energy that was going into the fight starts to settle on its own. Start with just one minute of being present with your discomfort.